Interracial Love Stories

BWWM Romance

Romantic Short Stories

I Just Don't Want to Be a Fool...Again
©COPYRIGHT-2003 BY MONET ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Putting the pen down and staring at the words on the paper, Noelle wondered for the 100th time why she even bothered. Rex did not care. And she felt like a fool. . .again. Everything he did and said made it blantantly clear how he felt about her. Yet, Noelle felt this dumb ass compulsion to tell him why what he did, or didn't do, hurt her. She sighed. What was the use? She had done this before and the results were always the same. He never changed, his actions never changed, his theatrical vows and promises of not letting her down again never changed. They were in this sick, twisted, dysfunctional dance and she was damned tired of it --- and him.

Noelle tore up the letter, she wasn't going to do or say anything. How long it would take him to notice the silence and contact her? Tossing the pieces into the trash Noelle realized she was not going to be a fool. . .again. If she and their relationship -- if you could call it that -- were important, then he would need to do the work this time.

* * *

"If I Were A Boy" by Beyonce blared from the speakers. Noelle stared up at the ceiling. Two weeks ago her decision to not contact him seemed reasonable and sane. But she had not though that Rex would just disappear from her life. Shit. What gene did men have that enabled them to walk away from a relationship without a backward glance?

* * *

Looking at the calendar, Noelle glanced at her watch making a mental note: it was 2:45 p.m., March 12th and she was over and done with Rex. It had been a month. While it had been the easiest break up she'd ever experienced, it was unnerving to realize that the man you thought cared about you didn't. So much for her being his soulmate. It was obvious the mating part was much more important to him than the soul.

The only thing that gave her any comfort was that during the past four years since her divorce she hadn't slept with any of the men she had date. Despite the promises and words threw her way, she refused to hook up with them until their actions matched their words. But, after four years she had yet to find such a man, and Noelle was beginning to doubt she ever would.

Depressed, she picked up the land line and dialed her two best friends on confernence call.

"Hi y'all." Noelle sighed.

Missy asked, "Are you okay? What's going on?"

"Hey baby girl." Adrienne replied.

"I'm here, depressed as hell, but here." She sighed again, "Still nothing."

"Nothing!"Adrienne exclaimed.

"What an asshole." Missy murmured.

Noelle's voice broke, "I just don't know what to do."

Missy replied, "Do nothing."

Adrienne snorted, "Well, I don't know about that."

Noelle's voice broke, "Yeah, I know. Still, I've got to do something... drama free."

Missy said, "Write an email."

Noelle sighed, "An email?"

"Yeah, get it all out, just don't send it."

"Adrienne?" Noelle asked, wanting her feedback too.

"Well, an email wouldn't do it for me... but, you've got to do what's right for you."

"Noelle, have you ever gone out with a white guy?" Missy suddenly asked.

"Uh...."

Adrienne replied, "Well, why not?"

Noelle's voice rose in disbelief, "Are you two agreeing on something?"

Adrienne laughed, "Lookee here, Miss Smart Ass, it's worth a shot."

Missy chimed in, "Uh huh. What have you got to lose?"

"Okay, okay. I admit it's crossed my mind. I just never seriously thought about it. Have you?" Noelle replied.

"Seriously thought about it? Sure." Missy said.

"I mean I've thought about it. But haven't persued it beyond, well, thinking about it...."

"Are you open to the idea?"

"I don't. . ." Noelle thought about it, "Actually, yeah, I'm open to it. I just doubt a white guy would ask me out."

"Let me tell you something. I am over waiting for my IBM and still single. If a fine ass white or Hispanic or Asian man asked me out, I'd go in a heart beat." Adrienne said.

"So would I." Missy added.

"Are you two serious?"

"Yes." They replied in unison.

Adrienne's playful tone dropped, "This idiot has walked by my office twice... as if I don't know this trial brief needs to be done. Girl, I'll call you later. Love you."

"I gotta go too, Noelle. Deadlines, blah, blah, blah. . .write the email. . .pour your heart out, or cuss him out. . .just don't mail it. Love you too."

* * *

She decided to pour her heart out, it was a short email -- direct, powerful and poignant. Noelle immediately felt cleansed after writing it. As she fininished writing, she noticed there was a new email that had just posted. Hoping it was from Rex, she hurriedly clicked the screen to send a copy to herself and delete the email as she opened the new email. Of course, that's not happened. Somehow she inserted Rex's email address and sent it while deleting her copy.

DAMMIT!!!
Noelle hadn't meant to send it to that moron... or had she?

* * *

The next morning there was an email. Not from Rex -- it was from someone she didn't know.

Dragonslayer?

Who the hell was that?

She opened the email:

Damsel In Distress -- Looks like the guy you were sending this to and my email address are similar. After reading it (and realizing it wasn't for me) I didn't want to just delete it without letting you know it had been sent to the wrong person. Btw, the guy is a jackass. You sound like an incredible woman.

Why I can't meet someone like you? Dragonslayer

Noelle read the message several times. What a nice thing to do. Most people would have deleted the email and not given a damn about contacting the sender. It also struck her as funny that their email addresses were Damsel in Distress and Dragonslayer.

She typed a quick response back:

Dragonslayer -- Thank you so much. I'm embarrassed you that you received this by mistake...but pleased (and shocked!) that you took the time to let me know you'd gotten my email by mistake. Again, thanks. Damsel

She hid "send" and in celebration of offically being over Rex -- and his not getting her email -- walked to the corner store to treat herself to some Haagen Daz.

* * *

"Are you going to buy that or just stare at it?"

The question brought her out of an ice cream overload daydream. Noelle turned around found herself dazzled by deepest, dark blue eyes she had ever seen.

She noticed his big, genuine, smile. The small scar above his lip on the left side. How his nose was slightly crooked. That his dark eyelashes were longer and fuller than hers, almost too pretty for a man. And that he was damned good-looking.

Realizing she was staring, with a small embarassed laugh she shrugged and said, "Can't decide which one."

His smile deepened, as dimple made it's appearance in his left cheek, "So buy them all."

"Don't tempt me."

"I wish I could."

"Have we met before?" Noelle asked, immediately wanting to take the words back.

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to come up with the bad lines." He grinned, blindsiding her with another knockout smile.

She couldn't help but smile back, "You seem familiar. I wondered if we'd talked before or if you lived close by or. . . . .now I sound like I'm on a fishing expedition."

He held out his hand, "Well if you are I'm hooked. I don't know if we've met before, but my name is Jackson.

Intrigued by his response, she placed her hand in his, "I'm Noelle."

He considered her hand in his for a long moment. Then raising his eyes to her slowly, he asked, "So listen, would you like to go out for ice cream instead -- my treat?"

Noelle looked down shyly and her eyes fell on her sweats. Suddenly she became aware how tacky she looked. She had on no make-up, her hair was twisted up a tight ball on the top of her head with a pencil holding it up, and she just knew there was major crustation in her eyes and corners of her mouth.

"Uh... not today.. how about I take a rain check?" He looked disappointed, stiffening slightly he responded, "Yeah... sure...another time."

Not understanding why she was bothering to explain herself to a stranger. Noelle gestured to her clothing, "I'm not blowing you off. It's just these are not my going out to eat in public clothes."

"No?"

"No."

"So what are they?"

"These are my I'm-gonna-sneak-into-the-store-and-hope-to-God-no-one-I-know-is-there clothes."

His blues deepened in color, "You look beautiful."

Day-um! "I'm available tomorrow."

"So am I... I think... and if I'm not... I will be." He gave her his number for her cell phone, watching to make sure she actually put in his number. "Promise to call me?"

"Yes."

And she knew she would.

* * *

When Noelle returned home, there was another message from Dragonslayer.

Damsel: No problem. Like I said before, I just wanted to let you know it was sent to the wrong person. And don't be embarassed, you were expressing how you felt. One of my favorite quotes is by Benjamin Disreali, "Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth." And if this guy can't take the truth, he isn't worth your time or your love. Dragonslayer

Stunned by his insight, she replied back again:

Dragonslayer, I thought you were a pretty special guy to let me know you'd recieved my email by mistake. After reading your last email, I know you are. If you are single, the women in your area must be nuts. Damsel

After sending the email Noelle turned off the computer and stopped in the kitchen to retrieve the Butter Pecan Haagen Daz. Pint in hand, Noelle began scouring her wardrobe for ice cream clothes.

* * *

She called Missy and Adrienne to tell them about meeting Jackson and their ice cream date. Synchronicity fascinated her. It was amazing that right after her friends had mentioned dating a white or Hispanic man, Jackson had appeared out of thin air and asked her out.

* * *

Noelle decided to wear matching denim shirt and jeans with caramel colored boots. Silver hoops sparkled in her ears. Her dark brown hair, swirled freely past her shoulders.

When Jackson arrived, they looked at each other and burst out laughing. He had on a denim shirt and jean, with brown cowboy boots. A small silver hoop in his right ear.

"Can you believe this?" Noelle asked.

"No. . ." But he wasn't talking about their clothes. Jackson was completely knocked out by Noelle. The impact she'd made on him yesterday was even more powerful today. She wasn't just a beautiful black woman. She was beautiful, period. And for the first time in his life, he understood what his best friend and brothers meant when they talked about how they just knew a certain woman was unlike anyone they had ever known before. Because he was feeling all that and then some. Not wanting her to think, he'd only chatting her up for sex, he tried to keep his eyes and mind from noticing the way her breasts jutted against the shirt or how the jeans hugged her hips, showcasing her luscious ass and incredibly long legs -- but, didn't have much success. Even so, Jackson knew in his bones his reaction to her was much more than physical.

Noelle was a bit overwhelmed. Man, how could she not have noticed how broad his shoulders were yesterday. He wasn't a hard-body and she doubted he had a six-pack. Which was fine. She liked men who looked like they were comfortable with their bodies rather than gym rats who looked like they were on steroids.

He escorted her to a table, pulling the chair out for her.

Wow. Most guys left you to struggle with the chair yourself. Ten points for that.

Once she was seated, he sat opposite her as the waitperson brought a tray full of tiny cups of ice cream.

She looked at Jackson in surprise.

"Taste test." He held up a mask and slipped it over his eyes.

The waitperson sat the tray down.

Noelle sat there, wondering what to do next.

Jackson smiled, "You'll have to feed the ice cream to me so I can guess the taste."

"Oh. . . okay."

Holding the spoon up to his mouth, Noelle's eyebrows shot up to her hairline when Jackson's very flexible tongue curved sensuously around spoon licking the ice cream off with slow, measured, strokes swirling around the bottom with a final voluptuous lick.

Dear.God.In.Heaven.

"Pralines, caramel, vanilla..."

"Are you sure?"

Jackson grinned and said with assurance, "Pralines, caramel and vanilla."

"Praline Caramel Swirl. How did you know that? Did you peak?"

"Nope. I just have a very discerning tongue."

Ouuuu. No way she was touching that one.

She placed the next spoon of ice cream up to his lips, expecting a repeat of his previous lick. Instead he lapped the ice cream with a succession of small, rapid, flicks of the tongue.

Noelle felt small beads of perspiration break out on her upper lip.

"Hmmm... strawberries, white chocolate.... cheesecake?"

"Right again... White chocolate and strawberry cheesecake."

With the third flavor, he teased the tip of the ice cream with a few circular swirls of the tip of his tongue.

Oh. . . My. . . God. . .

By the time he'd sampled the last cup of ice cream Noelle's inner thighs were clenched so tighty they ached unmercifully and were beginning to cramp.

The waitperson brought a new tray of ice cream, Jackson handed Noelle a mask.

"Ready?"

"Yep."

The spoon nudge at her lips, with measured care he fed her some ice cream.

A little of the ice cream trickled out of the side of her mouth. He scooped it up with a finger back into her mouth, gently sliding it over her bottom lip.

At his touch, Noelle was in immediate sensory overload. Who knew a man's touch could ignite her like this? Every hair on her body felt as if it were standing at attention. One thing was for sure, she was never going to be able to eat ice cream normally again.

* * *

That night Missy and Adrienne came over for dinner. They talked about everything but Jackson, until Noelle mixed up a batch of margaritas. Then all her friends wanted to talk about were the details of the date. At the end of the evening, Adrienne let them know they were getting together at her house tomorrow night to help her put a personal ad on an interracial website she had seen a few weeks back. Before falling asleep on the couch, Missy mumbled about how she was going to stop ignoring that sexy Asian dude at they gym.

* * *

A few days later as Jackson and Noelle walked to small bistro for coffee, she blurted out, "That was the most unique ice cream tasting I've ever had"

"I had a feeling you'd appreciate doing something off-the-wall and fun."

"Now what gave you that idea?"

"I don't know. Something just told me you'd appreciate doing something different."

"Well, you were right."

"Maybe now you won't have such a hard time deciding what type of ice cream to pick at the store."

"But how will you know unless you're there to help me?" Noelle teased.

"Hopefully I will be there next time." He said quietly, looking deep into her eyes.

"Time will tell." She grinned.

"Yeah well, like the Stones said, "Time is On My Side."

"Oh really?"

"Isn't it?"

"Thats up to you." She replied pointedly.

Jackson moved closer to Noelle, "How so?"

"Lots of guys talk the talk, very few walk the walk."

"So what happens if I do walk the walk?"

"You'll find out."

"Noelle. . . are you flirting with me?"

"Yes... yes I am, can you handle it?"

His hand sought hers and placed it securely in his, lowering his voice intimately, he replied "Yes... I can handle it... " And you. He thought to himself.

* * *

On their third date he took her to visit a elderly couple he did volunteer work for. As they did yardwork together Noelle found out a lot about him. While gathering leaves, she grabbed a couple of handfuls and dumped them on his head. Laughing, he shook his head and chased her around the yard, dousing her with leaves, which started a major leaf fight. Later that night as they said goodnight, he plucked a few remaining stems hidden in her hair. As she got ready for bed, she replayed the day in her mind, amazed at his ability make simple things so much fun.

* * *

To her surprise they began meeting to have a cup of coffee before work, eating lunch and spending their evenings together. Noelle was continually floored by how he came up with such simple, memorable things to do. Once he took her out to an organic farm where they picked some fruit, afterward he sliced open a watermelon and challenged her to seed spitting contest.

Then he took her salsa dancing and surprised her by arranging an introductory tango lesson. When she asked him why he chose the tango. Jackson smiled and shrugged. Noelle later found out it was because he wanted to know what she felt like in his arms.

On a really hot summer afternoon, he bought some SlipN'Slides at ToysRUs and hooked them up together so they could slide down the hill in his backyard.

During the archery lesson Noelle melted against him when he showed her how to hold the bow steady. With their bodies pressed together, it had taken all her willpower not to drop the bow, throw her arms around his neck and kiss him like he'd never been kissed before.

But she didn't. Being impulsive hadn't worked for her before. This time it was up to him to make the first move.

* * *

She and Dragonslayer were emailing each other daily. Then they progressed to chatting on IM. Noelle was surprised how much she looked forward to interacting with him. It was incredible how much they opened up to each other. Since their initial contact had been accidental and it was such fun chatting, neither had asked all the particulars. Eventually it became unimportant. Until he mentioned meeting. Noelle assumed he wasn't a black man due to his references and a few other things she noticed. She decided to let him know she wasn't a white woman -- if it was going to be a problem, better to deal with it here than in person.

I'm black you know.

So?

I wanted to let you know in case it mattered. . .

Should that matter?

Well it does to alot of guys. Even friends.

Lucky for you I'm not most men. LOL

Noelle had no reply for that. She sat staring at the computer screen.

What?

Nothing.

Why are you so quiet? :(

I just don't know what to say, I've never met a man like you before.

And I've never met a woman like you either.

I wonder if our friendship will transfer over into real life when we meet?

It may be awkward at first. But we'll be okay.

So what do we do if it is awkward?

We'll meet at cyber cafe and get online and IM each other. LOL

LMAO... very funny.

So does this Saturday work for you?

Yes.

Are you excited?

More nervous.

So am I. No biggie. We're just two friends getting together for dinner, okay?

Okay. :D

* * *

By Saturday and Nichole was having second thoughts -- what was the matter with her agreeing to meet some guy she'd accidentally met on the internet for dinner. . . was she crazy?

And what about Jackson?

Even though they technically weren't in a relationship. They had been practically spending every free moment together. Though he had not brought it up, she knew they were moving toward something. Something serious, she hoped. Would it matter to him knowing she was meeting and talking to some guy online? Then she relaxed, it wouldn't bother him. She and Dragonslayer were friends, nothing more.

Their meeting was set at a Thai restaurant. Noelle sat at a table alone, looking around the room a few times and glacing up expectantly whenever a single man entered the door. But no one wearing the same clothing Dragonslayer described approached her. With a sigh, she looked at her watch. When she glanced at the doorway again, she saw Jackson.

He grinned when he saw her and came over to the table.

"Well, hi."

She grinned back, "Hey."

"Having dinner?"

"Yes, meeting a friend."

"Me too."

Noelle glanced at her watch. Dragonslayer was late, she wondered if he was a no show.

"Is your friend late?"

Nodding, she replied, "A little."

"So is mine."

"If they don't show up would you like to have dinner?"

"Of course."

He sat down next to her, "I need to tell you something, Noelle."

"What?"

"I'd..."

Jackson cleared his throat.

"What?"

Her pulse began to race.

"Noelle... I'd like to take this to the next level."

She looked at him in stunned silence. Noelle had expected it, but it still shocked the hell out of her to actually hear him say it.

Jackson took her silence as a negative.

"If you need to think about it--"

"Think about what? You are talking about a relationship, right?"

"Yes." He moved his body next to her.

"What is there to think about? My answer is yes..."

Jackson pulled her close for their first kiss. As his lips parted and touched hers. Noelle was stunned at the depth and passion of his kiss, she had never been kissed so throughly in her life.

When she finally emerged from the sensual fog that had engulfed her Noelle noticed for the first time Jackson had on the same colored sweater Dragonslayer said he'd be wearing.

"Why are you staring at my sweater?"

With an adorable smile she replied, "Look at what I'm wearing."

He considered her thoughfully. Then he also broke into a wide grin.

"Well, I'll be damned. . . hello Damsel."

"Hello Dragonslayer"

Jackson pulled her into his arms and kissed her once more. And Noelle knew for a fact she wasn't going to be a fool. . . ever again.

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